Moth's life...

It was a moth. A moth that kept her covered. The television had the Champions trophy flashed loudly with   Harsha Bhogle’s   commentary. “The Mayor of Castor Bridge” lay on the couch upside down. She was cuddled quietly underneath the sheets listening to songs on the ipod. She kept herself entertained for what looked like an hour. Occasionally, opening the covers to guage the location of the moth roughly.  I’m sure she overcame her nature’s call as well. All for the big moth that flew ransom from room to room flapping its wing in sheer joy of accomplishing the unknown. It had kept my girl from watching her favourite sport on TV and even visiting the washroom!!

It took my heroic husband to slowly chase the moth out with just a piece of paper. That done, my otherwise brave girl came off her covers to look at the TV, read her Thomas Hardy and speak big on the match in progress. She talked eloquently with the father about her strong views on the captaincy, how Champions trophy was streets ahead in its class than IPL and of course had a good word for Tom Moody’s suit and tie! :) She braved the night to get us ice cream from the nearby shop and the day ended with a lot of thoughts streaming through my mind.

Fear is unknown till it is tapped with experience. Behind the very brave faces and acts can be dormant fears that get into vicious circles! It makes the ordinary very extraordinary.  Its only from these burnt ashes do people rise to face the deception of this true world of falsehood. All of a sudden the ‘true world’ sounds a perfect oxymoron!  Its about power and the numbers game!

The moth was chased. But a new one will return. I believe the next one will learn to get under covers if she doesn’t stay out of the covers.

Water Water everywhere...

Beautiful places have people visiting them and may be even more than once. The Telunas Island is a place like that for me. Like one family friend commented, “Its in the middle of nowhere!” Another called it “A different experience”. Yet others said that it had “So much nature”!

This time it was a big group with kids and adults. The place to me had everything and yet I know it had nothing but water all around!

The men indulged in Frisbee and the women in fashion parade of sorts. It seemed forever that the men had the cameras slanged around their necks clicking their ‘rubies’J(the lady Ruby asked for copyright!) Thinking back, it was the most hilarious part of the trip.

A lion’s share of the time there was taken up by the jetti jumping. Everyone making a positive effect on the other by merely doing their small part. It was the heart of the trip I must say. There were 2 levels of jumping-upper deck jetti jumping that could be done only when the tide was high enough and the lower jetti jumping that gave beginners like my man a challenge still! This trip had him overcome one of his biggest fears-water!! Whatever may be the case, it kept our minds filled with excitement. The kids ran ransom to see their parents behave like big kids! Truly woke up the child in all of us!! It brought to the table a deep sense of achievement and an amazing experience of feeling the air and water, like never before!

a major fun factor of the trip and one of the kids prefaced with "In my whole life it was the best experience....."(As though they have lived a 60 already!!:):)

Another aspect of the trip was the attempt to be with a crowd in its temperament and while doing so enjoying the spirit of the activity. Dancing had never been my cup of tea and to us (my man and me) the whole activity was about not being a wet blanket. For the first time, we moved our hands in violent imitation of some pro dancers among us. Two ladies took the cake for the bonfire dancing and rest of us did something close to a high fi exercise!! Grace in its very rudimentary sense too didn’t exist.

The 10 km forest trail through the tropical mangroves was an enervating experience! And yet the boat ride to the place with the wet and cool air blowing as we meandered through the backwaters is still my biggest take away!! I earned the Haldiram’s samosa for it!!! Haldiram’s aloo bujjia and moong dhal will always be remembered with this experience, as it fueled the whole trail  in its low energy points. The waterfall itself was the attraction and the wash in it was the challenge for some. Not to forget my innovative footwear (put together by well meaning friends)back as one of the shoes got quite literally washed away in the fast moving stream! Not to forget the moments when we recollected the old songs. It was not about the voice or the pitch or funnily not even about the lyrics(as many who didn’t know Tamil also sang something remotely(J) Tamil- Kamban twitched in his grave I heard)….it was about connecting with that genre of songs one remembered to share and how the rest of us just synced with the taste and even had goose bumps that we connected that way!! These sessions that happened after dinner too were unstoppable. It evoked a sense of belonging and gave my all time favorite pass time a complete facelift!

Simply the BEST for me! Awesomeness personified! Thanks to the pro photographer!

The lonely boat that still stays in my mind's eye!

The sunrise and sunset pictures may fade with memory, the feel of the air may cease to excite us, the lonely boat may not cast a spell for us anymore, the warmth of the bonfire may die soon, the sound of laughter may get lost in the noise that engulfs our busy schedules these days but what will remain will be the spirit of togetherness and freshness that the whole idea of this trip to Telunas will always bring!

Blinded by faith

A good old friend of mine, who shares the same sentiments on folklore and godliness was determined to brave the sun yesterday on Thaipoosam. She tagged me along and assured me that I am going to enjoy it!!  ‘Thaipoosam’ as the name goes is the Lunar month ‘Thai’(January/February) and the rasi ‘Poosam’ on this very day when Parvati gave Murugan a Vel(spear) so he could vanquish the evil demon Soorapadman. There is a misconception among people that Thaipoosam marks Murugan's birthday! Anyways never mind the misconceptions! Life has many alike!

The Perumal temple had a scintillating atmosphere and all the people thronged around the various ‘Kavadi’ bearers to get them started. Each one had a startling story to see! The spears all pierced and adorned with the bright golden and earthy Indian colors! It was a feast to watch the preparation. The men had to stand holding a pole while the helpers tied the dhothi piece around his hip till he could bearly breathe. Absolutely tight to ensure a low blood flow and after which the various piercings started . The nerves were skipped and pierced. One definitely needed to know body science in way that even the practicing doctors may not know. No blood drips at all!!

Checking for the nerves and piercing

Adjusting the spears

The kaavadi bearer almost prepared

It’s the ‘faith’ my friend said and having watched this ritual from the age of 8, I would love to believe that this knowledge of faith by conviction is the essence of this self-infliction!! But to me Science is very closely related to Religion and while I will keep to the sentiments of the crowd I saw yesterday, I still cannot help be speculative about this!

The walk itself was a few kilometers long and we started by noon. The sun blazing right above, the streets all resounding with folk music being sung aloud on hand mics. The kavadi bearer was the centre of all the noise but the dancers beside him definitely kept him entertained. Numerous stalls with water, juice and food were stationed to keep the people going on this religious journey. It’s a big community that comes together in faith and culture.

Many worshipped him too!

Bright earthy colours caught my eye

The entire traffic rolled by slowing near every kavadi bearers to check out the details of his piercings! There were chariots of favourite gods and family deities being pulled by the rope that was pierced on the bearer’s back! Slippers with 1000 nails, numerous danglings on a back, spears on the tongue and I must say that innovation was at its best! Apart from the spears  their tattoos said a million stories more.

The 1000 nails slippers

Quite bravely worn

When the long walk to the Tank road Dhandayuthapani temple ended, the temple had the Lord Murugan continuously engaged in prayers and an unlimited milk abhishekam(shower)! The darshan was absolutely satisfying! Many of them fainted and regained consciousness soon! It was a day of high energy and utmost faith and religious manifestation too!

The Dhandayuthapani temple

Trials and tribulations of life help strengthen spirits! It surely strengthens religious beliefs and brings an assured positive energy to people who have the real faith! The piercing and cutting may not make for any rationality but it still reiterates a very traditional Hindu belief that everything big is achieved only by hardships! Conversely, nothing achieved easily has ever lasted is the belief. Self-infliction of this kind just goes a little further to prove the Hindu wheel of karma!

The day ended with a lot of discussion on people and cultures with my family. My husband and me went with an empty trolley to the nearby 24 hour shop to get the Amul milk carton for a fortnight. The shopkeeper said with a smile, “I have run out of milk today. Please come 2 days later”. A smile escaped my husband’s lips as well! We walked back with an empty trolley but knew that many people today would have gone home with a full heart !

Unfailing silence

It was a school trip that took me to that part of the world. It was an island resort and in that sense only the resort. Many a times in our frenzied lives we all dream of an absolutely quiet and serene place for a holiday. My husband often made fun of my excitement to the thought of a quiet sunrise, beaches and wood houses. Well I really got around to see something of that sort.

These were silhouettes chalets. The nights were filled with an occasional frog sticking on the wooden basement making noises, the sound of the quiet waves, a stillness that kept me wondering if that moment qualified the Quietest Moment of my life!!

The view outside my room.

 

Everyday, there, dawned with a riot of colours that painted the sky with unbelievable beauty. As we reluctantly stirred out to catch the first morning rays, all of us had a camera capturing whatever caught the eye! The colours it cast in the sea were unique and definitely rolled into kaleidoscopes that we never saw before! As the sun screamed through the day, a quiet in the hammock was the most eventful part of the day! It was a day to do nothing and we did just that.

the view of the chalets from the hammock

An excited lot, took videos of the hermit crabs that went about the shore with such industrious work! Its their living that fascinated us! They moved all the time in a swarm(an army in my opinion)! They made funny dunes on the shore where the waves hit the shore tirelessly! Sort of like the chocolate icing(brown sand!) on the cake! Quite artistically weaved on fine sand. No pictures of these as am very scared of crabs and never went near them!

The evenings brought us on the deck where in the pretext of fishing we sat chatting and never took our eyes off the horizon. We hardly caught fish bit did end up jumping of the jetti into the sea. It certainly was the most exciting part of the day! Everyone talked about how the pit of their stomachs took a turn when they descended into the sea!

The sun slowly and steadily set leaving the rest of the day to be feasted by stars.  The setting sun had a beauty for me like none other. It metaphorically meant different things on different days! Loved the colours and the spell it casted on the lonely boats that floated near the deck. I cannot remember how many different pictures I would have clicked of the boat and the walk way!

walkway

the deck before we sat fishing.

the boat that was the subject of a 100 pictures

my favourite shot

end of day

Star gazing after dinner was a ritual everyone waited for. To lie flat on  the deck staring into the sky to understand the North star, the Archer’s sword, The constellation and the of course the bright evening star. The Orion and such else with their mythological stories made sense when you searched for them with an App on the iphone!

The day normally ended late with chatting about Philosophy, contemporary issues and religion. Of course a coffee that was specially brewed and had an aroma that kept lingering through the conversations and had no effect on the deep slumber we all went into when we retired to bed.

It’s the air, the sentiments, the total lack of intentions to do purposeful things, the lazing and the beauty of quiet all around that gave the day a special dash of happiness! The only thought I had on those few days on such a routine was a small pang of greediness to bring my man and girl back here to have the same experiences with them! Something about that thought was not appropriate in the context of ‘asking for more’ in life but must admit was a thought pregnant with determination to make it actually true!! Oh the human mind!! Never failing to ask!!

A guilt trip!

My girl has grown up! Big time! Its been a lot of muddles and puddles metaphorically for me lately. While I am physically on all the tasks that I ever do, there is a great sense of absence at the same time. Not sure how many of you mothers out there have been there and felt that! I fixed her dinner about a few days ago and sat down next to my Docking station and played an old Hindi number. I guess I had switched off at that time. She turned around and said, “ Amma you aren’t listening, why don’t you switch off the song?”. Quite alarmed at the direct interrogation I just smiled and switched it off. She then quietly ate her dinner and pinged my man from my hand phone to ask him where he was and when he is expected at home. Surprisingly, she closed the food and cleared the stuff clean. Cut the fruits and came and sat next to me with a smile. She simply started rattling about her day(she only normally does when asked for it!). While I definitely did not listen to her jabber I keenly observed her to know that she too was just  trying to switch me back to HER mode. The day ended with a guilty me.

Preoccupation is an obsession. It does eat into my routine and I just call it concentration lapse. On a normal, good day as a mother there are always things left to be done, things to be said, chores to be completed, long awaited topics to talk to my girl. Its always a fantastic conversation where I not only listen to her voice and what she says, my antenna senses what she hasn’t said too! Being able to read her that way makes me feel rest assured and contended. Never thought that she will ever have such a ear for me. With her quiet disposition and just a few sentences she conveys her worry for me. Her silences are more compelling than her jabber. She never persists like I do. She quickly lets me be and continues with her routine. Of course there is an extra bout of talk with the dad but that’s about it.

 Unhealthy, unprecedented moments have nothing to offer. As rational beings, we understand this on a good day. Succumbing to it is a choice that we all make consciously and then of course blame the times and circumstances. The issue never solves and may be never meant to be solved. Hey may be even not worth the effort here to blog about it. What remains at the end of the day is those few hours of a meaningful life and fun has already slipped off on the not-so-eternal Time.

Life definitely presents many difficult times…. things that we say have never happened and therefore we messed it, things that  shook our balance and things that cause unnecessary ruptures to a fully blown happy life! We have no one to blame for the falls, bruises, scars, cuts and the metaphorical fractures so to speak! If only we realize the cliché …a line often told by my paternal grand mom every time I played more and worked less ” This time and day will not come again”(In Tamil). Snap off and cut short! Let go and switch off! Bounce back to the important people and make up for the precious time lost!

The only saving grace is my girl’s “ Amma are you ok today? Want to tell you something! It’s a bit silly but will tell you….will you ACTUALLY listen? Surely? ” There is possibly nothing meaningful she will say but she has said enough to get me back! At least back to her

Its a no-no to cake!

Many birthdays with this man has gone by. One thing sure shines through. He hates mushy romantic expressions. This year has been special in a lot of ways for him. 41 is a clear indication that the 40 has started and trouble with the bones and limbs brewing. Quite literally one of his finger bones have been broken from some heroic cricket. I’m not proud of it any more. They bother me big time. I digress. Will come back to what annoys me a little later. Pleasantries first!:)

His daughter makes the ‘mushiest’ card and he receives it with the ‘mushiest’ smile I heard(Amma, Daddy was so happy and shy!).   Many years have slipped by starting with the first year of our married life when I brought a small cake with candles to blow at the stroke of 12 and my man simply thought that I was out of my mind and need some serious counseling. It shocked him, annoyed him, puzzled him and opened his eyes to a whole new idea of celebrating a birthday!

By laughable Rach means 'Fun loving'. But all the adjectives have a message for me also:)

more hearts and stickers for the dad!

Some years I have been scolded for spending on expensive gifts and wasting my time in the hot Madurai sun looking for A.R.Rahman CDs. It made no sense to him as the songs could well be heard on normal cassette tapes. Music was his second love (first being Cricket as you all knowL), it still wasn’t reason enough to spend on a complete ARR album those days! Now  are you already wondering its not worth it as the first and second places have been taken off and  where I feature! Well, better not to speculate and lets move on. Third place still has many contenders you see!  And I simply rest the issue of this ‘whole place thing’ (like he calls it!) for reasons very apparent!:)

One year was a Tshirt that was ‘wrong’ colour because the only right colour was blue you see! One year was a perfume that gave him a strong migraine and another was an informal shoes that were not tasteful enough and a bit garish too in his standards. Sigh! Never got it right! Oh not to forget the wallet that didn’t have a coin pouch and the Robinsons leather belt that was too large for his jeans loops. Sigh again. Comedy of errors! And yet I persevered!

This year is the first time I get it right! A plain milk semiya payasam does the magic. Of course there are small things to take care but most of all a fantastic hit with him! Let him watch some cricket if he gets home in time for it, a good traditional meal that has ‘Morkuzhambu’ in it and of course a visit with the family to the temple. A short walk, then sitting by the side of the pool and listen to (no sorry ‘bear with’) some cricket jabber.   People,  that’s about what he ever wanted in the first place to start with.

Its strange as years roll by that the more we need is just being us and them. Its about the simplest things that the heart finds happiness and peace. Me and my family!  It took us many years of stumbling to hit it right! Though I do complain like a normal wife will always do, about all the differences, its but in great love and respect that I must admit that surprisingly its for the same things that I fell head over heels!

Here’s to my birthday post for him!

As a teacher!

There has been a lot of messages on the phone, mails and messages to tell their wishes! A great  day for teachers indeed. It always warms my heart to see the real and genuine thank you in their eyes. Students and batches come and go. Its but in great interest and memory that we remember each student and that one thing they did, that definitely gets them remembered forever.  

If ever we meet students after many years and that has happened a many many times, there is a certain fear that immediately pops up. God, can I get the name right? Batch right? Almost always we do get it right. Nothing is more offending than to get these two wrong. Else of course you got to remember something uniquely the student did right. Well, that sets them smiling and they are just plain immensely happy that they are still in your memory with such detail even though you forgot the name and batch. I admit that at the stroke of the word, “Hello Ma’am. Do you remember me?”I am very nervous and already wearing a smile to conceal my wracking of the head to place a kid in a batch that left 8 years ago or 10 years ago. Then quickly recall the name. One thing is assured-every kid we teach is special and we had them in our heads all the time when we taught you and perhaps as years go by and so many more batches have come to take the place in our minds only miss placing them by a whisker!

Its an absolutely engaging conversation thereafter. It drifts to the other classmates they are in touch with, the small incidents they recall from their still young minds(which we sometimes don’t recall…. age does catch up on us!). Most of the times we do! What they did and what they are doing. What plans for the future and then of course “Ma’am did you have more brilliant batches than us?”(this question is normally from the more competitive ones). Now this is a tricky one. Well yes and no! Well we might want to say yes(because that’s what they want to hearJ) ,  the answer may still be we did have other batches brilliant in other different ways. The fact remains all students and batches are indeed special to all teachers and we do hold them in our memory all the time.

Year after year we teachers take pride in telling others how brilliantly our kids do in University and even share with our other colleagues those brilliantly written short notes of appreciation from students. Its in all these little notes, the thank you mails and messages, the eyes that scream gratitude, the smiles that show the respect that we teachers think a world of what we do. We brag subtly (this is refined as we get older in this profession!:)) and sometimes more proud of their college admission than their parents themselves. I am boastful- Like so emany more of my other colleagues, I hang these notes in my cubicle in the staffroom and have a whole lot of them read them right through the year! Now –a-days its also when students knight you to write their college ‘Letter of recommendation’.  The words flow and ebb with content when it indeed was a fantastic student. We then know that what we did makes a difference and even strive to do it better as years go by!

And wonderful notes and surprises!

Happy to acknowledge another year of Teacher’s Day wishes!